I always bother my husband with my comments during Hannibal, so I decided I should bother the internet instead (or as well). In order to avoid spoilers, I’m going to do an old episode – Episode 10, Buffet Froid. I’ve time stamped to make things easier. Here we go!
3:12 – Oh, I don’t recognize this character. They are going to die.
4:09 – HERE WE GO!
4:15 – A) That is a super deep bed
B) Here’s my murder theory: all of her blood was instantly transported into a super soaker and then sprayed across the floor. Brilliant.
4:17 – Haha it’s funny but also I’m afraid things are under my bed…I made myself scared.
4:30 – Will: I like how we can be vaguely poetic for like five minutes before we actually talk about shit. BROS 4 LIFE!
6:43 – I know the intro is supposed to be blood, but it just looks like fruit punch.
8:11 – WELL THAT WAS FISHY!!!!! (laughs forever)
8:27: Jack is always mad about everything. Get out of the bathroom!!!! Stop being crazy!!!! Why is this person so murdered!?
10:13 – I want to do what’s best for you. You know, not best-best, just best for me…and like second best for you.
15:33 – “As you can see, this is a super shitty clock.” “Hmm…yes. Thank you doctor.”
17:49 – Oh more lying doctors. Things I’ve learned Hannibal: all doctors are lying dicks.
18:00 – Doctor: “MWAHAHAHAHH”
21:09 – OH SHIT! EW!!
22:06 – Poor Will.
22:58 – “I’m not sure what I saw was real.” “And you’re so full of snark I know you’ll be real with me.”
24:37 – Way to victim blame there, snarky-pants.
25:08 – The bureau also talks about how you’re super smexy.
27:52 – AHH CREEPY GIRL! Dogs, where are you on this!? Bark or something!!
29:37 – Doctors didn’t say much? May I suggest that it is because they are all dicks? Who lie!?
32:26 – “I am bedrock!” Not bedrock who makes great choices, but eh.
36:47 – Why so serious. Etc.
38:34 – Good dogs! Who’s a good dog? Wait…how did she find him? How did she get under the bed? Murderers have super powers in this show.
40:01 – Well that was unexpectedly touching.
41:46 – Oh my. Wait…Hannibal’s a murderer?